After a While After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesn mean learning and company doesn't mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, And you begin to accept your defeat with your head up and you eyes open, with the grace of an adult,not the grief of a child, And you learn to build all you roads on today because tomorrow ground is too uncertain for plans. After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone else to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure... That you really are strong, And you really do have worth. | Mere Christianity"Something which is directing the universe, and which appears in me as a law urging me to do right and making me feel responsible and uncomfortable when I do wrong." - C.S. Lewis This coming Friday will be the first time that I have a bulk photography assignment :) It's going to be fantastic, but I am doubting my own two hands and eye will capture the right moments. With this spring of the moment event, I had to cancel more than 5 events I was to attend this weekend! C.S. Lewis's words this morning had me. Whenever we cancel, we know we're breaking the social code that none of us can perfect, yet still strive to. What continues to stop me each time I feel the pressure to perform and guilt for cancelling is Veronica's poem. For I have been learning that I can endure day by day, accepting defeat of breaking the moral code with my head up and the grace of an adult. "It is after you have realised that there is a real Moral Law, and a Power behind the law, and that you have broken that law.. - it is after all this, and not a moment sooner, that Christianity begins to talk." - C.S. Lewis |
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"Finding a way to stay awake to this one wild and beautiful life." - Ann Voskamp Take a moment and listen. We each need the reminder that life really is beautiful, no matter what it looks like at the moment. We each have been given gifts from the Lord and to thank Him as well as remember them daily, will bring you back to life bit by bit. Holy, ordinary, amazing grace. - Ann Voskamp Last week,I came back to my apartment on Monday and met Alan with an exasperated attitude. I had more than enough things to do in order to be ready for classes, but my darkroom photography class now had a huge assignment (huge referring to the amount of time that goes into ten brilliant photos) due in one week. There was no way that it was going to get done. The Lord took this and started to turn it around immediately, breaking me down by asking me to quit Voices of Hope and the darkroom photography class. Then He nudged me to start going to the Red Dot, a multigenerational women's group that had been meeting during VOH practice. So I stopped, and time started to slow down a bit :) This week,I have been able to spend time with the Lord, I have been able to relax in His love and listen to His Voice when He calls me to spend time with Him or move in a different direction. I have had time to take care of my body, make myself dinner, and really generate honest and open friendships with people whom He loves. I have started living in thanks for the things He has been doing, which has brought me to a deep place of peace and joy. I promise, I'm not crazy by cutting back. I am living in His grace by doing so. With the Lord's help,I realized that college students are always living under pressure to perform and in fear that his or her degree will not satisfy the needs and debt of the future. But if we were to understand that the Lord loves us for who we are and is Jehovah Jireh (our provider), we will be even more able to live with open hands and joyful hearts, even when hard things come.
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